And, I know I will make many mistakes and the bubble will burst on many that look ‘perfect’ at first (or second or third) sight, so I am prepared…..I think.

But thanks a lot for your comments and support. It is appreciated.

1. Crazy time. When long-term marriages break up, there’s a 3-5 year period of “crazy time.” Crazy time is just a time at which your emotions and impulses are all over the place. Cut yourself some slack.

2. Wanting a relationship now. Another common thing, often in the first year is the “transitional relationship.” I either didn’t have one or had a very long one or had too many of them, so I can’t vouch that this happens absolutely always. But I have heard again and again from people after breakup, the breathless announcement of MEETING SOMEONE who is bloody perfect. An idyll occurs for X period of time and then, pop, the bubble bursts. Expect that to happen. I had that briefly with a woman I thought was gorgeous and impossibly witty until — pop! — I took off my rose-tinted spectacles …

3. Feel free to make many, many mistakes. The reality is that no one notices (they’re busy criticizing themselves), or if they notice they’re jerks if they announce it out loud, and if they are jerks, who needs them? The point is no one can take away the mileage (or kilometrage), so go for the ride.

4. My impression of the gay world is … um, not to be homophobic about it, that there’s a lot that is shocking and objectionable and just crass. The same could be said of discotheques where 22-year-olds go (sorry if you’re 22). You sound more like a book group sort or a lecture series or somewhere where educated people of some taste show photos of something other than their own anatomy. (On Craiglist, which I occasionally surf for the personal ads as a form of entertainment, there was one woman who warned men NOT to send her “a picture of your cock.” So I sent her a picture of a rooster.)

That’s it for now … carry on. Oh, and for the mate bit, there’s the story of Miles Standish.

And I know all too well about artistic temperaments. My girlfriend always says the worst thing about me is my dark moods I get into when something goes wrong for me and it’s my fault it went wrong.

Not sure it’s courage and the determination is just what I do/am. Not sure if Bruce will be the one but he’s interesting and interested and also, in my eyes, quite beautiful (but in a more rugged way, sort of). And he’s artistic, which is what I’ve always wanted in my man, even if that is fraught with danger – you know, artistic temperament and stuff.
We’ll see

I continue to applaud your determination and courage. And when you least expect it……voila!!! Hang in

Love to you
Gail
peace…….