As I have dyed my hair since I was about 25, almost all the time, I make no secret of it. Hence, when I started getting grey hair, it was no problem to use the dyes that cover the grey. Since, when I met Victor, I used to dye it jet black, I tended to go for a darker colour than was natural and, should anyone ask me, I would confirm that I dyed it. Why not?

And so, every time I had my hair cut, I would also dye it.

F asked me on our first meeting if I dyed my hair and I confirmed that. He said I should leave it grey as that would be nice and he thought it was sexy. I promised that, the next time I had my hair cut I would let him see it before I dyed it, so he could understand why I dyed it!

And so, Friday night, I had the haircut. I have it cut short now as it is also getting so thin. He liked it both short and grey. He said it really looks good. So I haven’t dyed it this time. I was going to do it yesterday but ended up without time as we spent nearly all day together. Last night G came up and we went to the Brasserie Bruxelles. We were joined by A & F2 (and, of course, my F). G said that I looked younger (I’m sure it’s really that I look happier); F2 said it looked better without dye.

So, maybe, I shall leave it after all. It felt a bit strange until last night, really, not having it very dark brown. Let’s see what it’s like when I go into work.

After all, it’s a little thing, really, and if F likes it, then, maybe, I should just leave it as it is. I think it makes me look much older – but then the wrinkles and the lack of sleep don’t really help. In a strange way, I’m quite looking forward to next week……..but I’m sure that will change after one night without him!

And, of course, there will be the paranoia that will set in when I’m not with him. The one where I think that I’m too old for him; that we have nothing in common, etc.

Humph. Even as I don’t think this now, I know that’s what will happen after a day apart.

Yes, it’s OK, I know I’m crazy