I was worried.

What if, when I saw him, I wouldn’t feel that ‘thing’?  It hadn’t seemed so difficult and, in a weird way, I had actually enjoyed it.  I went out with A a couple of times and had a few beers.  Sure, I missed him but, you know, it’s life and we both have work to contend with and he loves his and so, if it means a week away, then so be it.  I had time to watch some episodes of The Tudors, season 3, which I had bought ages ago and never even unwrapped.  I had a glass or two of wine in the evening.  Tried to groom Dino a bit.  It wasn’t so bad at all.

Perhaps, I began to think, it would be easier like this?  And, if I didn’t seem to miss him so much then perhaps I didn’t, after all?  Perhaps I was trying to ‘hold on to it all’ just because the alternative for me is unthinkable?

I got to the airport and sat waiting at the exit.  He had already come out and so, a few minutes later appeared behind me.  I was disappointed that I hadn’t made it in time to see him come out and the ‘thing’ didn’t really come then because I didn’t see him from a distance.

We kissed on each cheek.  We chatted as we walked to the car.  When we got in we kissed.  And there it was.  The ‘Karl spark’ still there.  As we drove back to the city we chatted more but I knew that I was really pleased to see him and not just to see anyone but him and him alone.

I dropped him off at home and drove the two minutes to park near mine.  I tidied up a bit since he said he might come over – he missed the ‘babies’ (as he calls them – no, as we both do now).  We agreed that I would take them for a walk and he would meet us outside.  He wanted to see Dino go crazy.

We got out of the door.  He wasn’t around.  I hung on a little and lit a cigarette.  The boys didn’t really understand why we weren’t going on with the walk.  I saw him come round the corner.  He motioned me to be quiet, not that he needed to do that.  The dogs and I started slowly on.  He caught us up and started walking with us.  Dino looked at him a couple of times.

Then he suddenly realised who it was and went crazy with excitement.  You have no idea how much it pleases me – both that Dino loves him but also that he loves Dino.

He had bought presents.  A couple of Shaun the Sheep videos, some Royal Tea Bags (which are really funny), some Shaun the Sheep fridge magnets and some other stuff and Joan Armatrading’s new album.

I write this because I just started playing it.  The title track being the first track and the one that reminds me of the older Joan stuff.  Fabulous.

And I love the way that she still seems to ‘speak’ for me and tell of my current life (more or less).  And the first one does.  For, as I’ve said before, I’m a lucky guy.  Many, many things just seems to work out.  It is, indeed, a charmed life.

You know you came
Into the room alone
But when you left
Then I found that you took my heart
It sounds so corny yes I know it does
But truth is the shade
I choose to wear
I live and love with you
This charming life.

I do, indeed, live and love with you a charming life.