Is it time? Or, rather, is it even necessary?

Everyone wants to ‘fit in'; to be accepted by the people around them.

Me too, to some degree. Our friends are people who accept us as we are, warts and all. If they don’t, then they don’t, usually, stay friends which is fair enough.

So what things are important? after all, not everything everyone else thinks of as ‘fitting in’ suits me. For me, I just want to be left alone. As long as I’m not harming other people, why not?

So, I want a place to live that’s warm (at least in winter). I want to spend time with friends. I need to work, not only to earn money but also for the other benefits that working with others brings. I want my dogs and to be able to walk them and feed them whilst, at the same time, respecting other people who aren’t so keen on dogs. I want to go out to restaurants from time to time, or a pub or bar. I have to eat – even if not in a restaurant. I need clothes – they don’t have to be designer labels but it’s nice when they are. I want to be able to see different places, different people. I want to be able to live my life in the way that I want and in peace from other people. I want enough money to live my life comfortably but it doesn’t need to be over the top.

What I don’t expect is that everyone else will want what I want nor that they will, necessarily, agree with my choice of life. That’s OK as long as it doesn’t affect me and I’m not harming them, then what’s the problem?

Well, the problem comes when there’s a bit of trouble.

For example: if F were to go into hospital, me, not being a blood relative, would have no say in anything. In theory, I would not even have the right to visit him. Nor, if the situation were reversed, he me.

If I die, he does not automatically get everything I own.

I can only imagine the results of those things. Luckily they have not happened as yet.

And, the same was true when I was with V.

So, in one way, as the video below says, it’s time. And yet, there are advantages to having the life I have. Nothing in my life HAS to conform to the norms of society at large, if I don’t choose it. I am not locked into any stereotypical roles in my life except those that I choose to adopt (although there are, probably, quite a lot of people who would pigeon-hole me anyway).

I like being a bit different. I like ‘not quite fitting in’ It’s now doubly so since I am English and living in Milan. So, I have two ‘edges’ that, for me, make my life more interesting. Certainly not making it boring.

If we had all of the rights that other people have, maybe we would no longer be different and maybe we would have to conform more. I’m not sure that I really want that. So, maybe it’s not really time. Maybe it will never be time? Perhaps this is not really what we all want?

After all, marriage is two people living together through thick and thin ………….. until you divorce. And the real difference between that and, erm, being together? – well, for me, it’s not actually different. It’s only really different if you believe in the God thing and because you have a piece of paper to say you are married. And society’s view of you which is important to some people.

Anyway, this was the video that was posted on a (straight) friend’s Facebook page: