And, in the meantime ……..

……. I heard this on the radio for the first time, last night, driving home and I LOVE IT!  So I thought you might enjoy it too :-)

And, I love the lyrics too, especially this bit –

‘Cause I would walk a million miles for you, just to visit you, baby
And I’ll show you a trillion stars, the Moon is ours

Darlin’, I, I’m everlasting
I’m a sure thing
I’m the master
Giving you real, real, real love
And it’s yours for the asking
I put everything after
Giving you real, real, real love

I guess I’m a bit of a softy, really :-)

Progress. It has some advantages but not for everything.

For those of you who follow my blog, you may remember how pleased I was to find this flat.

It was on the street that I loved from the first time I saw it.  It was, in fact, the perfect street.  The flat was just right for me.  It was, in fact, the perfect flat.  And, so, this was the-perfect-flat-on-the-perfect-street – as far as I was concerned.

The street has many beautiful buildings.  It is a joy to walk down (as I do every morning when I take the dogs out) and there are many small shops and restaurants.  It gives a ‘village’ feel, even though we are no more than 10 minutes from one of the busiest and main shopping streets in Milan.  It is a haven from the normal hustle and bustle of the city.

We have everything we need here and I would hardly need to go anywhere else.  Our favourite pizza restaurant is just on the corner up the street.  There’s an Indian too, although I haven’t been there for ages.  There’s a small version of one of the supermarket chains, some cafés, a chemist, the place where I just had some pictures repaired, the vets are just off the street.  Yes.  All-in-all, it is the perfect street.

And the flat is wonderful.  It is old (1920s or 30s) – a little Art Nouveau with very high ceilings (that I cannot reach, even with my step ladders), there are nooks and crannies, a built-in cupboard in the kitchen (that was, probably, an old larder) – the flat has been divided up from a bigger flat, making it more interesting.  The rooms are large (for the city of Milan) and, even with my large English furniture, it is not too claustrophobic.

It took me a while to learn how to shut the windows properly.  They have an ornate handle.

To close them properly, you must first pull the handle away from the door.  It has a strange joint inside.

Then you close the door with the handle still out towards you.  Then push the handle closed but at 90° to the down-frame.

Then you bring the handle down to make it flush with the frame.

At this point the window is secure.

The one problem with these windows are that, because they are old, they are a bit draughty.  They are not really secure, either, to be honest.  It wouldn’t really take much to break in.

Also, the front door is not one door but two.  The left side (as you look at the picture) opens normally.  The right side has a bar keeping it firm and closed and you take the bar out to open both of them (when you are taking stuff out or having stuff delivered).

But, soon, all this is to change.  Some guys came in to measure all the windows and doors.  Apparently, the building administrators (landlords) are replacing all of them.

I know what this means.  We shall have modern double (or triple?) glazed windows.  Probably ones that open outwards from the top as well as open fully as normal.  They will be wonderfully good at keeping the noise out (when closed) and there won’t be any more draughts.  They will be much more secure.

In addition, the front door is to be replaced.  It will be replaced by a single door.  This door will be much more secure and will probably have a spy hole to see people when they come before you have to open the door.  The lock will be on of those that is securing not only the opening but also the top and bottom making it almost impossible to break in.  And, again, there will be no draughts.

This is great, except for one thing.  It will take a little away from the flat.  It won’t really be ‘in keeping’ with the style.  I am a little sad that they will be going even if I know that the result will be a warmer (and you know how I like it hot) and certainly more secure.

Hence the fact that I have taken photographs.  I love the handles and the way that they work and for all that the new ones will be easier and more efficient, it seems a shame that these ingenious pieces of engineering and aesthetically attractive handles will be replaced by fairly boring white plastic handles.

Ah, well, it is progress, I suppose.

Oh, yes, and the shutters are being replaced too.  You can see the style of shutters in the flats opposite mine in the following picture.  Maybe we shall get ones that close from the top – a single shutter – rather than these that close together.  Again, more secure – but it’s still a shame, in a way.

A quotation that I like

Things are not going well, it would seem.  There’s the to-do about the illegal immigrant who was released from jail (but she WAS pretty and young), there’s the homophobic comment from the other day making headline news and then some prostitute has suggested that Mr B (Buzz Lightyear) paid her for sex which, I learnt, yesterday, is actually an illegal act (the paying for sex, that is).

The other problem is that Gianfranco Fini, one-time best mate of Buzz and, until recently, by his side in almost everything, a reformed neo-fascist, so it is said, keeps sniping at Buzz.  He’s formed another group (soon to be party?) but they aren’t quite ready for an election yet.  Instead of bringing the current government down, he is suggesting that Buzz should resign.  Buzz, on the other hand is suggesting that if Fini is any sort of ‘man’ he would force a new election (Buzz isn’t actually stupid, I guess, in spite of his antics and outpourings that point to the contrary).

But, what of the current global financial crisis and Italy, I hear you ask ………..

……………wait………….

WHAT CRISIS?

the government of pretending everything is going well

I just LOVE this quote from Fini, talking (yesterday or the day before) about the current government in Italy (ignoring the fact that, until very recently, he was actually part of it).  I only hope it is a faithful translation!

As I said to my colleague yesterday, the real problem here is who is to replace him?  There’s simply no one strong enough to do that, at least, not from my outside view.  Names are mentioned but it has to be someone who can bring a number of parties together and, unfortunately, there don’t seem many people able to do that here.

Sorry, can you say that again, please?

These spam comments just get funnier and more weird!  I am posting the whole comment each time and exactly as it appears (without any links, of course):

i choked on amarble when i was like 4 on my bed while lying down. it was not a normal sized marble. it was big.

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im not sure what the exact average shoulder with is but it varies depending on your body frame. Im not sure the names I know there are 3 types of body frames and yes all 3 frames that everyone has 1 of will let your shoulder width get wider if you build muscle.

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Do not delete, please: (link removed, obviously)

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The best way that worked for me was to do chair push ups for the upper body. And the way chair push ups work is you get three chairs, then you make it where the two of them are the ones your going to put each hand on one. Then the last one is going to be the one you put your feet on. and if you want to make your waste get a work out too, then when you do the chair push ups, put one foot over the other and balance your wait on that. by doing that you will balance your wait and have to keep your waist up and work those muscles. Be sure to breath in and out when your doing the chair push ups! And drink lots of water. :)

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Calf Brains – yuck!!

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All you need to know is that the poor could only afford bread. All the other foods are all wonderful things that only the rich could afford. Oh, and crepes are not french, they are Canadian.

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Ain’t the 1st commenter speaking the real truth or what??

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Red and green, take a very small amount of the frosting in a bowl and experiment.

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You’ve gotten a lot of good answers about the sugar/water mix, but I thought that I’d add that I have several pots of nasturtiums near my hummingbird feeder, and the nasturtiums get visited just about as often as the feeder does! Nasturtiums are super easy to grow from seed (you pretty much just poke them into the dirt, water, and watch!) and will generally self-seed, meaning you won’t have to plant them again next year. And they’re edible! Amazing things. Anyway, good luck!

Please note that, although many of them seem to be about food, they are being ‘posted’ as comments to old posts and, so, have no relevance to that post.  Just plain weird!

This is NOT a food blog ……… I promise!

The men arrived at 5.  By 5.30 they had already left!  I was expecting it to take longer.

It’s brand, spanking new!  It shines.  All stainless steel and glass.  Out of place, in a way but that’s not why I bought it anyway.  It won’t last (the super shiny bit) – or maybe I’ll try to keep it like that.  Well, I will try.

I thought, for a horrible moment, after the man had gone (of course) that there had been some mistake.  The numbers I was expecting were from 1 to 6 – not 150 to 275.  But, no, it’s OK after all.

It’s a little wider than the last one.  But that’s all to the good.  More room and I like room, especially for cooking.  See this is turning into a food blog or cooking blog or something similar.  For I am talking about my brand new cooker.

So, let’s see what makes it better.

I now have proper temperature control on the oven.  I have missed that so much.  Now I can cook things at the correct temperature instead of guessing.

It is both bigger on the hob and in the oven.  A baking tray I had bought some time ago but would never fit in the last oven fits easily in this.  Now I can use all four burners on the hob without having to have half the pans halfway off the cooker.

I do not have to use one of those hand-held electronic ignition lighters.  It lights automatically. The oven also has a light.

It has a grill (as an integral part of the oven), something I kept missing with the old one.

It has some special ventilation fan that keeps the outside much cooler than the inside and, so, won’t ruin everything next to it.  However, it is still gas, which I love and, for me, is the only way to cook both on the hob and in the oven.

It is beautiful.  It makes me want to do things.  But that is for tomorrow.

It also happens to be a Smeg – which, of course, is the last name in kitchen appliances.

Now, all I need is a decent fridge and a proper fitted kitchen and I will be done.  But those things can wait and are not so important as the oven.

I am a very, very happy person.

I expect to have fun with this object.

Rude comments …. but, maybe, a hidden agenda?

Why have you taken out my post? It was very useful information and i promise atleast one person found it helpful unlike the rest of the comments on this web site. I’ll post it again.

Whoops, it seems like someone isn’t happy with me treating their comment as spam.  But, really, there’s no need to be rude about my other commentators, is there?

However, the clue, I think comes in the next bit:

Fed up with getting low amounts of useless visitors to your website? Well i wish to tell you about a new underground tactic which makes me personally $900 each day on 100% AUTOPILOT. I really could be here all day and going into detail but why dont you just check their site out? There is really a excellent video that explains everything. So if your serious about making effortless cash this is the website for you.

I have removed the link, obviously.

But it seems it must be a very powerful person after all! The comment being made by one Shawna Ellenbogen. Not a name you instantly recognise? Me neither. However, their own blog is given as yahoo.com! So, Shawna owns Yahoo! Wow! Don’t know why she would be needing to make $900 dollars a day as I’m sure, as the owner of Yahoo, she should be making that in a single minute!

Ah, well, I wouldn’t care if she was the Queen of England (sorry Your Majesty *doffs cap and bows*), there’s simply no need to be rude to my other commentators – so into spam it goes ………..

It seems I come first, after all!

“It’s OK”
“Don’t worry about it”

Well, that’s what I wrote. Apparently it wasn’t her fault. Well, I thought, then let’s not beat about the bush. “When is the wedding?”, I write.

“What wedding?” and then, “He’s not getting married”.

OK, well that’s enough then.

I just write, “How strange”

Of course, I was asked why it was strange. I explained that several people, to whom I have mentioned ‘the wedding’, were just surprised I knew about it rather than not understanding what I was on about – which is what you just did (although I didn’t add the last bit – only thought it).

“There’s no date set”. So, and the “What wedding” and the “not getting married” bit, then? What was that?

Basta

And don’t be thinking of getting angry with me about the short shrift. I can’t stand lying and you, as one of the people who were there at the time, should know better. It seems not.

It’s not that it’s a massive surprise but, still ………….

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I’m doing stuff. I mean, sorting stuff out. Much to do. Very busy. Some physical (putting up cupboards, buying new cooker, etc.) and others just practical (paying some bills, sorting out companies, etc.) – but, the important thing is doing it. And it makes me much happier.

Last night he got home really, really late. He lost his way on the way back. Too busy talking to his colleague! Hah! And, so he was very late. He texted to say he would drop his stuff off at home and come to me. I was surprised. I thought that, as he was really tired, he would not come. I can’t go to his place as Rufus is quite ill at the moment and, although on medication, it seems to be taking a while to clear. Up until recently, he would be ill (diarrhea and stuff) about once a month for a couple of days. Now, it seems like once a week. I thought it was eating shit in the dogs areas at first but now I’m not so sure …..

And he is getting so thin. He is just a bag of bones now, especially at the back end. I know it’s how it is but, you know, it is sad to see. Still, he is still walking OK, not falling over (except every so often) and, generally still looking healthy (ish).

But, as he is currently a little ‘unpredictable’ with his toilet there was no way we could go round. Still, I was very happy that F had to decided to come round to mine.

I took the dogs out (it confirmed that Rufus was still ill) and then had a shower.

Then he phoned. Would I mind if he didn’t come round? He was really sorry but he was so tired. If he had known it would be like this, he would have come straight to mine. I do understand. It was a surprise when he said he would come over in the first place. I said not to worry and that I understood and he said:

“Yes, but I wanted to to be with you and the babies”.

It seems I come first, after all!

Tidying up a bit.

This post is full of lines and paragraphs from old, draft posts. Posts that never ‘made it’. I like some of the bits below though and, now, I have got rid of all these draft posts.

Enjoy!

The feeling that ‘I’ve seen all this before’ prevails and I mistake that for being wise.

I read an interview today. Someone said that he didn’t want to be content. That content sounded like ‘maturity’ and that implied decay.

A single lie that I find out means that everything that is said might be false. Probably is false.

Funny, isn’t it. Some people spend their whole time trying to convince you they are someone that they’re not.

He sings songs to Dino. The latest one is:

pupi pupazzo ¨ un cane pazzo
pupi pupazzello ¨ un cane bello
pupi pupazzino ¨ un bel bambino
tu che sei dino
sei un cane carino

>The tour was surprising. Mostly because most of it remained the same or, nearly the same. England’s green and pleasant land remaining green and pleasant – with lots of sheep and cows and, so, lots of photo opportunities!

Yes, he was probably bored, the sheep being a welcome distraction.

We drank beer, he ate fish and chips and I ate lamb. We walked around the towns. We went to the church where my Grandfather was buried. I tried to explain but found that I couldn’t really.

My Grandfather was 83 when he died; my Grandmother, 85. They lived quite long, really.

His philosophy on life was that you had a good life if you were ‘content’. And he’s right and always was. My father never understood that, always striving onwards and upwards as he did and now probably having died before he was even 70.

We exchange few words, the woman who owns them and I. It’s too early in the morning for me to understand Italian and, anyway, we don’t need to talk. I’m not good in the mornings. Today neither she nor her dogs are there, of course.

Gotta be strong. Gotta say ‘no’.

This meant asking for the stuff. F said to get 1 etto (100 grams) of prosciutto and half an etto of coppa and salami. I asked about buying the pre-packed stuff, saying that I wasn’t sure the deli was open but the horrified look on his face said all that I needed to know.

However some friends (of theirs) turned up just as we had started and hadn’t been invited to dinner and just sat on the sofa, reading, whilst we spent the next couple of hours eating.

At that point I began to realise that certain ‘strong’ memories of his were, as most people’s are, just a figment of his imagination.

Well, you know, fuck that for a lark.

I hope he doesn’t let you down but fear he will. But, please don’t be asking me why V has not been in touch or not come round to see you. He’s not my responsibility any more and I don’t have to make the excuses like I used to – go figure it all out for yourself.

Let’s say that we’ve both given each other some shit over the years so we must be ‘even’ by now but, still, fuck you for believing in what V has said. It is, in the nicest possible way, utter bullshit and for you, an intelligent guy, I thought, to have fallen for V’s greatest trick, makes you a fool at the very least.

“It’s the same for me”, he writes. I misinterpret that a little

Of course, it will never be ‘over’. Undoubtedly, I shall be ‘paying’ for it, in one way or another for the rest of my life and there will always be some little thing that will come back and haunt me but ….. still ……..

I realise now that I never understood him (probably, in much the same way as he quite obviously never understood me).

He always went from ‘mad passion’ for some friend or other to another. I learnt to avoid getting too attached to them (unless I really liked them too), knowing that it wouldn’t last that long in any event. The last time I did this, I was worn down after years of being told that this person was wonderful; I didn’t think so. Within a year or so of my ‘giving in’ the glorious affair was over but with such suddenness and such hatred that I vowed never to put myself in that position again – and I never did.

…. but there will be that falseness behind it. The people that you don’t exactly ‘dislike’ but that, if they aren’t there, actually don’t mean that much to you.

I just wish that the closure of these paragraphs would reach the closure of the chapter. We have both moved on and these things do not help either of us.

The old man rang yesterday. I knew it was him, since my phone said ‘Unknown Number’. I was driving the first time, walking from the car to my house the second, and doing something else on the third. It was the fourth occasion that I answered. “It will only take 10 minutes”, he assured me. I was not assured. I am assured that it will mean I am at least an hour later back at home – of that I am 90% certain, even if the actual work does only take 10 minutes.

And then that made me think about his blog. Do I want anything? At first glance, that would be no. The reality is, I think, that I do want something.

F is still feeling ill. Last night he had a stomach ache. He blames it on the food and drink he has had over the last few days – but it’s not that. It’s the drugs that he’s been taking. I try to tell him but he’s not listening and he’s Italian so he has a different view as to what causes things. I know it’s that because he stopped taking any tablets and his stomach was fine and then, last night, he got more syrup and some tablets and took one of the tablets and then suffered stomach ache.

He’s not really good with suffering – as most men; as most Italian men.

Re-living it all

It’s been difficult – and I wasn’t expecting it.

As I explained previously, I found that, during the transfer of this blog, some rather strange characters had appeared and the photographs for certain posts no longer appeared.  So, I decided to fix them.  This meant going through all the posts from the beginning (and that’s nearly 800 posts now)!

I have learnt a number of things:
1.  I write a lot of crap.
2.  Most posts are not nearly as interesting as I must have thought they were at the time.
3.  I don’t always remember what I am talking about.  There again, some of them brought back some memories of events or situations.
4.  I know that V and I split at the end of November, almost two years ago and, yet, it took me almost a month to write anything about it.

And, I found, surprisingly, that reading through some of the posts from December onwards brought back the memories.  Rather than ‘brought them back’, it would be better to say ‘made me re-live’.  This was not so good.  They weren’t bitter memories just sad; sad memories for what should have been and wasn’t, for a future that I thought was, more or less, secure and, in fact, was like wet tissue paper – falling apart in my hands.  Even for the two years previously, there were some posts that hinted at what was to happen but the actual events, the actual posts, my fears, shock, despair – they are all tangible to me in the posts I wrote.

In a strange way, I am grateful to have them, to be able to read them.  I am also grateful that it didn’t seem to last too long as I am now up to the point where I have selected the-perfect-flat-on-the-perfect-street and I can see, through the writing, that I have come through the worst of it and I know it gets better after that (well apart from the crazy few weeks).

So, sorry not to be posting but I will be back soon, I promise!

Just updating old posts is all

Sorry for no new posts.

I discovered that all my photographs had disappeared from the old posts when I brought the database over from the old hoster – and some of the symbols (-, “, ©, etc.) had morphed into a strange selection of symbols.

So, I am updating and putting the pictures back.

A side effect of this is that, as I re-post an old post, if there is a link to another of my pages, it is showing up as a new ping-back!

I’m hoping that it won’t take too long to do but we shall see. Please bear with me :-)